I Love Denny Crane - Ergo - I Must Love Myself

I spoke to two friends last night, one was a friend from my days (and nights) spent at Kagnew Station in Asmara, Eritrea and the other was with a young friend (53 years old) who lives in the western Chicago suburbs.

The second conversation consisted of reminiscing about people and events that happened more than 40 years ago. Old Army buddies tend to do that sort of thing. Inevitably the conversation will turn to our current ailments and how nice it was to be young and indestructible. That and the weather are the primary topics of conversation when people over 60 shoot the bull on the phone.

The earlier conversation with my young friend from Chicago was of a different nature. He had called me on Wednesday night, but I didn’t answer the telephone because I was watching Boston Legal on the ION Network and was totally engrossed in the episode. I could have put it on pause on the TIVO, but I didn’t.

I returned his call early last night, as I knew that he would be going to our favorite Forest Park watering hole at 8. We talked about the Chicago Cubs and Baseball in general. He mentioned that he was planning a trip to Florida (Clearwater) in March and that perhaps we can get together during that time.

He then asked me why I didn’t answer his call on Wednesday night.

(Since this is not a verbatim conversation there are no quotation marks).

He Sez – Were you out getting laid?
I Sez – No, I was watching Boston Legal!
He Sez – It’s been cancelled.
I Sez – It’s in syndication on a local channel (Six episodes -in order- per week).
He Sez – I’ve watched it from the beginning, it’s a good show.
I Sez - I didn’t start watching it until 7 or 8 weeks ago. I really like the show, I especially like the William Shatner character Denny Crane.
He Sez – That doesn’t surprise me.
I Sez – Why?
He Sez – Because you are Denny Crane! You like yourself.
I Sez – I’m not wealthy and I’m not a Lawyer.
He Sez – No, but you have all of his other attributes.
I Sez – What do you mean?
He Sez – You’re biased, bigoted, a lecher, a cavorter, a philanderer and a homophobe. You’re over opinionated and you don’t care whose feelings you hurt. However, you never let your friends down and everyone of your friends respect and tolerate you for that reason. That is why you are Denny Crane. And that’s probably why you like yourself.
(After a short pause, while I was thinking of a good comeback).
I Sez – So what do you think about the Cubs chances of going to the World Series this year?

The Beach Bum